Trust

Someone I know recently wrote about thin spaces in relationship to an experience he once had. Thin places are a significant part of my Anglican spiritual tradition, coming from the Celtic Christians whose gifts infused the early English Church. Earlier this week, I listened to a bible study on the Baptism of Jesus. In that story, the heavens are torn open and the Spirit descends and God’s voice is heard. The word used for torn is the same word used in the Crucifixion story, where the curtain of the Temple is torn.

This reminded me of thin places, where the veil between the divine and the creation is stretched so thinly we sense the presence of the divine. Those are the places where we hear and feel and experience the great mystery in a unique way. They give us our glimpses into God’s soul, as it were.

 

In the midst of a personal relationship struggle, or perhaps it’s a full-fledged crisis, I’ve thought about this idea of thin places. About how difficult, impossible even, it is to experience such a thin place between two human beings. How impossible it is to really see into the soul of another. When we cannot see the deep truth of another, cannot know what the other is thinking and feeling for ourselves, we are left to trust. I strive and struggle to trust. But it is so difficult. For so many reasons. I hate the doubt within myself but I understand it. It is my nature to trust, and I hate when I find myself questioning that trust.

My goal is to live a life of sincerity and honest, of openness and authenticity. I think I’ve done that. When it comes down to it, it’s all I can do. To be who I am called to be, to live a life of love that is given without condition.

-David